| The Month in Review |
| A monthly feature recapping all Lefty Golfers Association events |
| October 2003 |
OCTOBER 11, 2003 - CAUGHNAWAGA
HALE E. NORMAN
CHRIS 9-IRON KID
P.P. HORNSBY
CHRIS 9-IRON KID
P.P. HORNSBY
48-44--- 92
55-50--- 105
50-57--- 107
55-50--- 105
50-57--- 107
The LGA returned to action for the first time in two weeks, visiting the Cog with an all-lefty threesome. Teeing up in fog so thick
no one could tell if there was another group on the fairway, thankfully no one was injured and things cleared up quickly enough
to witness Hale Erwin Norman runaway with an easy 13 shot victory over Chris The 9-Iron Kid for his 16th event victory of the
season, 10 more than the ever-absent Dr. Mario Blondin. Norman carded 37 putts for the round, one of his worst days on the
greens this season, but his competition would turn out so crappy he could have taken a dozen more. First case in point was the
uninspired play of Chris The 9-Iron Kid. Able to score only one par during the round, 9-Iron dug himself into a hole with a barfy
10 on the short par-5 5th. Chris held the cellar position through the first 17 holes, but still ended up in second place as
beneficiary of an even worse performance by P.P. Hornsby. Actually, Hornsby's overall showing wasn't so bad, as he trailed
Norman by only one shot through 10 holes. However, his 9 on the par-4 11th put him out of the picture, and his 8 on the finishing
hole was enough to squander second place to a grateful 9-Iron Kid. It was a bizarre day all around, first with the thick fog
affecting visibility on the front nine, and the spotting of a senior citizen alleviating himself of solid waste just off the 12th green.
LGA officials were uncertain whether the old man thought it was still foggy, or was making a statement with respect to the quality
of LGA play.
no one could tell if there was another group on the fairway, thankfully no one was injured and things cleared up quickly enough
to witness Hale Erwin Norman runaway with an easy 13 shot victory over Chris The 9-Iron Kid for his 16th event victory of the
season, 10 more than the ever-absent Dr. Mario Blondin. Norman carded 37 putts for the round, one of his worst days on the
greens this season, but his competition would turn out so crappy he could have taken a dozen more. First case in point was the
uninspired play of Chris The 9-Iron Kid. Able to score only one par during the round, 9-Iron dug himself into a hole with a barfy
10 on the short par-5 5th. Chris held the cellar position through the first 17 holes, but still ended up in second place as
beneficiary of an even worse performance by P.P. Hornsby. Actually, Hornsby's overall showing wasn't so bad, as he trailed
Norman by only one shot through 10 holes. However, his 9 on the par-4 11th put him out of the picture, and his 8 on the finishing
hole was enough to squander second place to a grateful 9-Iron Kid. It was a bizarre day all around, first with the thick fog
affecting visibility on the front nine, and the spotting of a senior citizen alleviating himself of solid waste just off the 12th green.
LGA officials were uncertain whether the old man thought it was still foggy, or was making a statement with respect to the quality
of LGA play.
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OCTOBER 13, 2003 - LAFLEUR
CHRIS 9-IRON KID
HALE E. NORMAN
P.P. HORNSBY
HALE E. NORMAN
P.P. HORNSBY
45-40--- 85
46-41--- 87
50-47--- 97
46-41--- 87
50-47--- 97
The LGA took advantage of a summerlike holiday to complete what will probably be the final doubleheader weekend of the
season at Lafleur. After a half-hour delay, it was determined that Dr. Mario Blondin would once again fail to appear (again
without prior notice, leaving grave doubt that the two-time Lefty Masters champion would be welcome to return in 2004), and the
remaining all-lefty threesome could begin the event. On a course somewhat shortened by the use of temporary tees, Chris The
9-Iron Kid displayed incredible form, scoring seven pars for the round and shattering his lifetime best score by 6, coming in with
a sizzling back nine 40 and a two shot victory over Hale Erwin Norman. It was 9-Iron's first career sub-90 round after over a
decade gracing the LGA circuit. It was also his third event victory this year in 14 tries, turning '03 into a decent season for The
9-Iron Kid. Runner-up Norman put up a fine showing of his own, scoring two back-nine birdies to break the all-time LGA record
for most birdies in one year with 11, and in the process passing P.P. Hornsby for the season lead in that department. Hale's 87
also turned out to be the best losing score since the league's inception. Finishing last once again to complete the 'reverse
doubleheader weekend sweep', as Hornsby himself put it, was P.P. Hornsby. Although P.P. Hornsby was able to break 100, his
front nine 50, and in particular, his ugly 9 on the par-5 first hole, put him too far behind to catch his red-hot competition. 9-Iron,
who normally does not engage in posturing of any sort, allowed himself some self-appreciation after his victory, but his words
were neither memorable nor understandable enough to print.
season at Lafleur. After a half-hour delay, it was determined that Dr. Mario Blondin would once again fail to appear (again
without prior notice, leaving grave doubt that the two-time Lefty Masters champion would be welcome to return in 2004), and the
remaining all-lefty threesome could begin the event. On a course somewhat shortened by the use of temporary tees, Chris The
9-Iron Kid displayed incredible form, scoring seven pars for the round and shattering his lifetime best score by 6, coming in with
a sizzling back nine 40 and a two shot victory over Hale Erwin Norman. It was 9-Iron's first career sub-90 round after over a
decade gracing the LGA circuit. It was also his third event victory this year in 14 tries, turning '03 into a decent season for The
9-Iron Kid. Runner-up Norman put up a fine showing of his own, scoring two back-nine birdies to break the all-time LGA record
for most birdies in one year with 11, and in the process passing P.P. Hornsby for the season lead in that department. Hale's 87
also turned out to be the best losing score since the league's inception. Finishing last once again to complete the 'reverse
doubleheader weekend sweep', as Hornsby himself put it, was P.P. Hornsby. Although P.P. Hornsby was able to break 100, his
front nine 50, and in particular, his ugly 9 on the par-5 first hole, put him too far behind to catch his red-hot competition. 9-Iron,
who normally does not engage in posturing of any sort, allowed himself some self-appreciation after his victory, but his words
were neither memorable nor understandable enough to print.
OCTOBER 19, 2003 - ATLANTIDE
HALE E. NORMAN
*COSTA DOINBIZNIS
P.P. HORNSBY
CHRIS 9-IRON KID
*COSTA DOINBIZNIS
P.P. HORNSBY
CHRIS 9-IRON KID
43-45--- 88
52-43--- 95
56-49--- 105
55-55--- 110
52-43--- 95
56-49--- 105
55-55--- 110
After over a decade of LGA action, our lefty heroes (and Costa Doinbiznis) played their first ever event at Atlantide. The
temperature was brisk, but there was plently of sun and no wind, making for a pleasant day. The day was especially pleasant for
Hale Erwin Norman, who scored six pars on his way to his second straight sub-90 round, this time good enough for a victory,
his 17th this year. Norman built a 13-shot lead over Costa Doinbiznis through 13 holes, then coasted to the victory in spite of
The Biz's 43 coming in. Actually, Doinbiznis' day only became pleasant on the 12th tee. Costa rallied to lose only by seven after a
crappy front, finishing the day with a chip-in birdie on 18, on possibly his last shot of the year. Hanging on to third place was P.P.
Hornsby. After needing 17 strokes to complete the first two holes (heave!!!), Hornsby settled down nicely, particularly coming in
where he fired a 49. But by the time things stabilized for P.P., leader Norman was well out of sight. And speaking of out of sight,
rounding out the field was Chris The 9-Iron Kid, playing in his 15th event this season, most for Chris since his embarassing
penis enlargement surgery of 2001. Coming off a solid 85 and a victory from the previous week, 9-Iron showed his trademark
inconsistency, firing a par-less 110. Who knows what comes next for The Iron Kid? With the win, Hale Norman solidified his
Player-of-the-Year status, while Doinbiznis failed to catch Dr. Mario Blondin for second place in overall ranking, falling short by
several shots. Not knowing if there will be anymore events at this late stage of the year, Costa was optimistic, pointing out that
"at least I will have finished the year with a chip-in birdie".
temperature was brisk, but there was plently of sun and no wind, making for a pleasant day. The day was especially pleasant for
Hale Erwin Norman, who scored six pars on his way to his second straight sub-90 round, this time good enough for a victory,
his 17th this year. Norman built a 13-shot lead over Costa Doinbiznis through 13 holes, then coasted to the victory in spite of
The Biz's 43 coming in. Actually, Doinbiznis' day only became pleasant on the 12th tee. Costa rallied to lose only by seven after a
crappy front, finishing the day with a chip-in birdie on 18, on possibly his last shot of the year. Hanging on to third place was P.P.
Hornsby. After needing 17 strokes to complete the first two holes (heave!!!), Hornsby settled down nicely, particularly coming in
where he fired a 49. But by the time things stabilized for P.P., leader Norman was well out of sight. And speaking of out of sight,
rounding out the field was Chris The 9-Iron Kid, playing in his 15th event this season, most for Chris since his embarassing
penis enlargement surgery of 2001. Coming off a solid 85 and a victory from the previous week, 9-Iron showed his trademark
inconsistency, firing a par-less 110. Who knows what comes next for The Iron Kid? With the win, Hale Norman solidified his
Player-of-the-Year status, while Doinbiznis failed to catch Dr. Mario Blondin for second place in overall ranking, falling short by
several shots. Not knowing if there will be anymore events at this late stage of the year, Costa was optimistic, pointing out that
"at least I will have finished the year with a chip-in birdie".